yours truthfully

April 2nd, 2017
Today I have again fulfilled my capacity as a people hater, especially towards my wife. I have ignored all her questions as to my secret virtual dalliances history, giving false answers and or deviating from the main subject by starting a fight and insulting her. I hold myself unaccountable to all her queries. Only last week I ignored her questions regarding why I deleted my LastPass history, why I have over 70 applications on my iphone and ipad, why I disguise and sweep every trail of all my activities on my ipad, iphone and pc and why I am online 7x24. She deserves no truthful answers. She deserves only lies. She is just a pest in my eyes. The more pain I cause her, the better. I take every opportunity to tell her that I have had enough of her, want to get rid of her, wish her dead and her very existence disturbs me.
I have no qualms about hurting her emotionally and physically. I have no ethics regarding sanctity of marriage vows and fidelity. However to her, I always claim to be hundred percent straight,  guiltless, honest and true. I see her struggling with life especially with her son's serious health problems and yet I am in complete apathy. I watch and sneer. Evasiveness is always better. She calls me on Duo but I ignore it and tell her that my phone did not ring. I can do all kinds of things to block and manipulate such things because I am an IT wizard. She is miles away and has no way of tracking me down. My strategy is paying off, I can see that she is at her wit's end. Maybe she will end her life in that remote village- if only. What a fool she is. I never showed her my true face. She is beginning to be aware of my secret activities but can not come up with any solid proof. There are only a couple of messages she saw by pure accident (I somehow forgot to delete permanently )  a colleague sent me ..telling me he misses me MUCH and is thinking of me. I start big fights every time she raises this question and of course, deny everything categorically. I hope she will learn to shut up and bear her load. I am determined to keep my affairs secret. That's me for today. Yours truthfully.